Don't Change Locations, Change What's Inside

We spent a lot of years early in our marriage pursuing happiness.  And we made the same fatal mistake that most young adults make when they start seeking happiness.  We decided that happiness was somewhere where we were not.

We moved to Boston and took a job with a lucrative startup company.  But despite living in a nice townhome with our two adorable little boys we spent our days wishing we were somewhere else.  When we had made it big, when we moved back by family and bought a big home, then we would be happy.  Boston was just a stop on the road to where we wanted to be.

We worked hard very very hard and we saved our money.  We didn’t take time to walk the Freedom trail or to eat lobster.  We were sure that just around the next bend in the corner, after this phase of life, we would arrive at our destination.  .  We invested little in our relationships with each other instead investing in work and church and feeling perpetually more and more annoyed with each other and our situation.

One Sunday a church leader gave a talk that deeply impacted my life.  He started talking about soap.  Soap dispensers, actually.  A little weird, I thought.  He said that the bathrooms in the church had always bothered him.  Whenever he washed his hands there were annoying soap drips on the counter from the liquid soap.  They had tried moving the soap dispensers, but despite moving the soap dispensers to different positions on the wall, the annoying drips remained.  One day something changed.  He went in to wash his hands and noticed there were no more annoying soap drips on the counter.  Finally!  They had found the perfect position for the soap.  Then, as he took some soap he realized that the problem had been solved differently.  Foam soap.  They had changed what was inside.

This was a lot like life, he said.  A lot of us spend our lives thinking that if we just change locations, things will get better.  Instead, we need to change what's inside.

Annoyed with your spouse and ready to divorce him or her?

Change what's inside.

Tired of your neighborhood and always dreaming about bigger and better digs?

Change what's inside.

Frustrated with your dead-end job and continually looking for new employment?

Change what's inside.

Wishing that you had a new friend, a different church group, or a school situation more suited to your liking?

Change what's inside.

Now of course there are extenuating circumstances that can make a location or relationship change the very best choice.  However, I believe that we attribute too many of our problems to external sources.  So many of our problems we attribute to our circumstances when in reality, it is our attitude that needs changing.  If we would look for the positive, take some initiative, and make some personal changes we might find that our circumstances would drastically improve.  Often, the solution to our problems is closer than we think.  Actually, it's inside.

Phillippians 4:11
I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content.